When I Die

Three or four days a week, I meet with a friend to work out. Monday morning we were working out and catching each other up on how we spent our weekend when she told me that her friend had passed away over the weekend. The man who died was about three years older than me and had went to the same high school that I had went to. There were a few other ladies exercising with us and joining in on the conversation. The talk was mostly about the widow and how she would handle the loss of her husband. They talked about how young she is and in good shape, that she would probably find another person to love and love her back, and I guess they are probably right but all I could think about was, "was Jack a christian? Did he believe Jesus to be his savior? Had he ever asked God to forgive him?", where is he now and where will he be for the rest of eternity. For several days now that is all I can think about. I started thinking back at some of the people that I have lost, both of my grandparents, a couple Uncles-in-law. Were they Christians? Did they have a personal relationship with Jesus? I read a book about a year ago titled, "23 minutes in Hell" by Bill Wiese. In his book, he describes how God had showed him hell. His story is terrifying. I can't imagine my grandparents suffering the way his book describes suffering or my husband's late uncles who were just the sweetest men on this earth. I sit and think to myself, that I should have mentioned Jesus to my relatives at least once. I should have asked them what they believed in. But I didn't and now its too late. I will never know. Why is it easier to witness to total strangers than it is to witness to family members? So I have decided that everyone who is close to me should know where I stand. So that when I die, (yep its gonna happen to me too some day),no one will have to wonder where I am or where I am spending eternity. Here's my testimony to any one who cares: I have always believed in a loving God. For as long as I can remember . Its what I was taught. I always went to Sunday School. I was in the choir. I was a good girl who tried to always please every one. but I found out that didn't mean anything.
The summer between seventh and eighth grade I attended church camp. First time ever. I loved it. It was sports camp and we held our own Olympics. I was very nervous as it was the first time my twin did not accompany me. One night at camp we had a speaker tell us how Jesus loved us so much that He died for each one of us, He paid the price for our sins. He also said that you can go to church every day for the rest of your life, you can give all your money to the church, you can be nice, and you can be a people pleaser but its not going to get you into Heaven. You must have a personal relationship with Jesus. You must ask Him to forgive you and you must become obedient to Him. He told us it was not enough to just believe in Him, even Satan and his demons believe in Him. I had to turn my life over to Him and that's what I did that hot summer night. I gave my life to Jesus. I went home a new person. I was a new creation. Life couldn't have been better. Fast forward 9 years, I just gave birth to my daughter. I was overwhelmed with the miracle of life. This beautiful baby was mine. I just couldn't believe God would bless me and my husband with such a beautiful child. I decided to be obedient and get baptized. Well, I had already been baptized in my church when I was about 12 because its what was expected of me but I didn't really understand it. The preacher dropped a few drops of water on my head and then on the head of my twin and that was that. Now I felt so blessed that I really wanted to be baptized and three months later I was baptized, fully immersed, in a pool down the road. I went on with my life, married to my best friend, mother of a daughter then blessed with a son. I got so busy going to PTA meetings, ball games, swimming and judo lessons, that I put Jesus on the back burner so to speak. Oh I still believed in Him, I still said a five minute prayer every night before going to bed. But my devotion went to my family first. I no longer had time to really study God's word, or to spend a lot of time talking to God. Until...until a storm blew in and made my world go dark. My husband couldn't help me and my kids couldn't help me. I knew I had to turn my life back over to Jesus. He would take away my pain. I needed to trust Him again. So one night a couple of years ago, during revival at my church, I knelt at the altar and gave my life back to Jesus. Now (just like the song) I will move ahead bold and confident, taking every step in obedience. So for anyone who might wonder where I will spend eternity...no need to worry..my hope is in Jesus!